Actually, I have no rights to say at all.
I don't do the things that I say, but I learn from experience.
I 'say' but I don't 'do'.

I can't complain about ''Why can't you tell me huh?! I care, and your not telling me! What am I to you?"
I say those a lot too, Who am I to judge and I'm not trying to judge, but I do and say those things too.
But when I think about it, I ask myself  ''Wth, why am I even forcing them?"
Yes, I know.. I know by me saying like that is like threatening you or something,
it's making you really 'hard-to-be'.

I will, I'm trying, I promise I'll try my best and change and not disappoint you,
I'm really sorry for everything that I did which made you mad and disappointed and upset..
I'm sorry. I hope you can forgive me, I'm learning,
I'm trying really hard to do my best and change into a better person here.
I'm not trying to be perfect or what, I just really don't wanna lose you all anymore.
I don't wanna lose anyone anymore. Every single one of you are very important to me and fulfill my life,
you guys are a very big part of me, you made up more then half my sweet memories and life!

I may be scared of insects, spiders, cockroach etc.
But here's my biggest weakness and fear, I've never told anyone before I guess..
But I --' Maybe most of you out there feel the same too.
My biggest fear is to lose each and everyone one of you in my life.
I don't wanna lose anyone of you, no, not now.. not ever, never!

I hope you can forgive me for all that I've done to make you upset,
I mean it.. please. I'm nothing without you all.
I know I'm bitchy, rude and I can get very mean and all,
but I'm really sorry.

I have a choice whether to be like this or not,
but I chose to be like this.
Thank you for accepting me for who I am,
and supporting and being with me all these times,
I promise, I'll try my best to change into a better person now.
I hope it's not too late to seek for forgiveness :/
-Do Re Mi



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