Imagine yourself living in a word who no one accepts you for trying to be 'you'.

Thanks, thanks for stating up what's not it and making it-it.
You know, I really didn't have a choice.
You blame me on listening using the headphones and earphones too much that's why I can't hear anything much.
Fine, that's ok. But hey.. you accuse me for LYING.

Why the hell would I lie about that? You think it's so fun!? You think I would like to have this kind of problem!?
huh?? Getting scolded for not hearing what other people say,
getting others irritated by going ''Huh?? huh? What'' constantly cause you didn't catch what they say. Getting scolded just cause you didn't hear anything! Getting laugh at for that!! You think I would want that!?

Nevertheless.. your someone who's always by me. Since I was about 5-6 or maybe 7. I've been going to the doctor just to check what's wrong with my ears for years but never get the answer!

You know.. I don't have a choice. I can't control it. You think its so easy for me?
hearing the ''EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!'' sharp sound like when a mic goes wrong. You think it doesn't hurt me!? ..It sucks for me either. You can't feel what its like.
I really wish I could control it or something. But I can't!

When I try to listen, that's when it'd go wrong and against my will!
And when I try not to, I can hear it clearly!!
I didn't ask for this! I didn't want it to be this way either!
I really didn't..

But..maybe that was before.
Sometime, --'
I have to admit. Having this problem is somehow good too.
So I don't have to listen to you(and you and you and you..you..and you..y--') going on about how I'm such a disgraceful daughter, how no one will ever appreciate me, how I'll never make it, how I belong to no where,
how I'm such a bad friend, how people look down on me etc.

At least.. I don't have to hear about how I'm terrible, horrible etc all day.
That hurts.. it really hurts.

And you know.. I am doing this for you, aren't I?
You complain about how noisy it is when I play my songs then ask me to get out.
You always ask me to use a headphone. And now your blaming me?

..I'm tired. I really don't know anymore....what am I supposed to do?
How can I please you? How? What do you want!?

But I guess it's not always easy to please people and that there's always a good and bad in everything.

Imagine yourself living in a world.. where not even your family themselves appreciate you.



•